Tuesday, August 03, 2004

Are You Afraid Of The Dark?

A small child sits up abruptly in her bed. The darkness threatening to choke her once again. She calls out, “Mom!”
No one answers the first call so she calls out again, “Mo-om!”
“Go to sleep!” Is the reply she hears from down the dark foreboding hall. She can’t go back to sleep. Is it death she wonders? How can it be anything other if she feels dead when she’s asleep and that scares her. The darkness scares her. She pulls the covers around her and makes sure to tuck herself in the sheets well so that nothing can slip into the bed. So scared of the monsters that are just within reach all around her that she doesn’t dare move. Fear has her frozen in its grip. She calls out once more, already aware of what the answer will be.
“MOM!” It took everything she had to over-come the fear gripping her to call out into the night. To alert her unseen monsters of where she was, hoping that she would be saved.
“GO-TO-SLEEP!” Sleep will not come back to her this night. Anxiety hits her as she lays in the haunting darkness alone. Too young to realize that monsters aren’t what she sees on television or reads about in books. The real monsters are flesh and blood just like her.
She cries. As quietly as possible, she doesn’t want to draw attention to herself until the light of dawn comes to save her. This was an every night occurrence.
At some time she starts sleeping with all the lights on or during the day. Though it was bad for the small child’s health, it was much worse on her in the dark.
Years pass and she becomes a teenager. Though she is still afraid of the dark, she can now push it to the back of her mind and find some semblance of a restful sleep…with all the lights on. The memories of monsters unseen and yet so close in the dark forever haunting her frail spirit. To survive she had to push them to the farthest corners and deepest recesses of her mind. Never to be thought about again, until the moon rose over head and the sun said it’s good night. She had never progressed far enough to trust anyone. She was still the small child in the dark calling out for her mom. A mom, who didn’t want to be bothered.
I still sleep with a night light on to this day…