Saturday, August 14, 2004

Nightmare on Kings road?

For the last several nights I've been plagued by nightmares. It shouldn't be something that I am not used to dealing with. For all of my life I've had nightmares, chronic. I would be chased by a man whose face I could not see. A dark, dangerous man, who sought to do me harm. In some of the dreams I remember him choking me and would feel myself dying...fading away into awakeness. So strange, to dream of death and even feel it closing around you only to wake to reality instead of Heaven. However, most of my nightmares I couldn't remember, as if the sunlight turned them into ashes like some cheap vampire film.
Then something happened while I was pregnant with my daughter. The nightmares stopped! Sure I had those weird "pregnant" dreams that every woman has, but no nightmares to speak of. I started really dreaming. Like all of my friends talked about. I was finally normal, or well, as normal as I could be. LOL. I had had a few normal dreams before, but it was like they weren't completely normal. They were more like things that needed pondering. I guess that is the best way to describe them. Even though they might not be nightmares, they plagued me with their strangeness. Hmm...I wonder what some "shrink" would be saying right now...no I don't...I've got a text book on it, lol. Stupid Psychology!
So now what? Here it's been almost five years since my last recurring nightmares and suddenly they've found me again. I suppose it's all of the stress in this house right now, but damn. Now I can't even be comforted in my sleep (big sigh of frustration here). Maybe, I should make me a dream catcher...I made one when My daughter was born and one for my step-mother. I used to make them for the psychic fairs with my friend. I know it's superstitious BS, but at this point...I'm willing to try.